The following takes place June 9, 2006 :
Okay, so I was driving around in my "friend"
Paula's car after she, I, and 2 other girls were leaving this party. I think they were drunk, because for some reason in the back seat they all changed into their bathing suits and at a stop light jumped out of the car and ran through some sprinklers by a movie theater. I wasn't complaining, cause I'm a horny bastard...but that's beside the point. So anyway, after they got all the randomness of their lives out, they threw the clothes they had taken off in the trunk and slammed it shut. (Little did Paula know...her panties and jeans were hanging out the back of the trunk...nearly dragging on the street as I was driving). As if this wasn't bad enough, I let a drunk girl tell me how to operate a car. She was telling me that the headlights weren't on, when I knew damn well they were lol. Anyway, she turned the switch again which CUT the headlights off. So basically, I'm a black man driving at 3AM with a pair of panties and jeans hanging out the back of my trunk with no headlights on and somehow there was a taillight out, you can see where this is going. WOOOP, BEEP BEEP Po-Po pulls me over and asks for my license and registration. Car isn't mine, and Paula is too drunk to find the damn registration so this isn't going well at all. He then starts putting me through the damn ringer. Asking me where I've been, where I'm going, and why there are three white women in my car with bathing suits on half passed out. I have no answers for the guy that are valid, but I tell him the whole story anyway. He maintains a straight face through the entire ordeal, stern, and stoic. Then out of no where starts losing his damn mind with laughter (It appears my misfortune has saved me). So anyway, he makes me pop the trunk, he puts the pants and panties in the trunk, turns on the head lights, and makes me promise to tell Paula to fix her taillight tomorrow, which I didn't cause dat biotch had to pay for what she did to me. So then, I drive to McDonald's and get all the girls ice cream and then we go back to Paula's house. Next thing I know, while we're in the back yard, an Cop starts shouting my name and pulls me off to the side. I'm like, WTF again?!? This time, it was because I parked illegally or something. He was about to give me a ticket then I told him about the whole thing with the half naked girls, sprinkler, Po-Po pulling me over prior to him...etc. He starts laughing his ass off and lets me go...oh...but this doesn't stop here...
The next morning, I'm driving to go get a haircut and a cop pulls me over for speeding RIGHT OUTSIDE my barbershop. My shop is in the hood, so white cops love to bust us lol. He claimed I was going 52 in a 35 zone. How he did this I don't know since he had no Gun out to gauge my speed, that sonovabitch. Anyway, he slaps me with a $120 ticket. I go to court, get put on diversion and am required to complete a driver's education course...which I didn't do. So 2 weeks ago I get a court appearance order from the prosecutor's office and my dad is flipping out! Like absolutely losing his mind because I was the last of his four sons without having a criminal record lol. He thought I blew it...finally I told him the whole story, but he didn't laugh cause he never does.
Long story short, RISBYN the reason I won't be getting my computer on Saturday is because I'm going to a driving class from 8:30AM to 4:30PM and then going to work from 5:00PM to 9:00PM... <_< I think that's the most typing I've ever done on a forum. Enjoy the epic that is, Palerider.
lol
